Jealousy
by Lienka
Summary: James finds Lily with somebody else... How will he react ? Now 2nd chapter ! two shot. :
1. Chapter 1

_Disclaimer: I own nothing but my precious copy of Deathly Hallows. _

"You had absolutely NO right ! " Lily Evans shrieked. He had never seen her so mad.

"But... but," James spluttered.

"What ? No buts ! It's my life you know, and I can do whatever I want ! "

"Lily..." he said pleadingly.

"Don't. Just don't, " she told him more calmly, shaking her head. "I'm sick of it, I'm sick that I cannot do what I want, I'm sick of you. Why are you doing this ?" The last sentence was more a whisper. He could see tears, and hurt in her beautiful eyes.

Suddenly he wasn't able to say anything to her. Then she turned around, and went off.

He had known he shouldn't have done it but he couldn't help himself. Love is very powerful... but jealousy even more. Seeing her with somebody other than him was cruel. At least for him.

She was laughing with him, she let him holding her around her waist... and yet James couldn't even come to her within one metre. she had never willingly looked at him, let alone laughing at his jokes. Despite this he loved her. Even when he was just seventeen. He kept dreaming about her... about them going out, laughing together, kissing... Sirius called him love-struck fool. And maybe he was.

However now it looked like his dream would never come true, anyhow he wished. Because he hurt her. It was all his fault.

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

James Potter, seventeen year old wizard, was wandering in London streets, bored and slightly depressed which was little unusual for this man. It was hot summer with sun shining and no even small chance of rain, but despite of this he wasn't happy. His friends were away, and even his best friend Sirius had to 'do something'. So he wasn't there to distract him. But it wasn't the only reason of his state. He was fed up with all of that. He was out of age, and yet he couldn't do anything. It wasn't fair for his parents. They were elderly and now even seriously ill, he would never forgive himself if they died of worrying about him fighting against Voldemort. He sighed. He hated the feeling of helplessness. There were so many people dying just because they were at wrong place ! He came to the Leaky Cauldron but he immediately turned back. He couldn't bear to hear about another attack.

So instead he went to the nearest park and he sat on the bench. Soon he was trying to ignore the couple behind him. It gave a lot of work because they were really close, and they were laughing loudly. Man whispered something to the woman what James presumed to be 'sweet nothings', and she stopped laughing.

James sighed again. It was really starting to be unbearable how everything made him think of Lily. Lily Evans. Two words that made his world seem brighter. Pity she always said she hated him. Not that he hadn't tried. He asked her out countless times.And she refused every time. Well, it wasn't his fault she was so stubborn to admit that she in fact, loved him. He couldn't understand why, though, it was taking her so much time. wasn't he the Quiddich Captain; one of two most popular boys in school AND the best in transfiguration in their year ? He was. So why ? He shook his head.

Suddenly giggles interrupted his thoughts. Oh, no again ? Funny, they sounded almost...

"Liiiilyyyy, " said man's teasing voice. "I didn't know you were so ticklish"

"No, stop, please, Derek. I beg you," she said but James could say she was smiling.

"Okay, but I have one condition"

"Which is"

"You must kiss me." "Okay, but you will pay, remember"

"And how will I pay, may I ask ?"

"You will have to kiss me once more." And nothing was spoken after this reply.

James sat there, petrified. What if it was his Lily ? He slowly turned his head as he was expecting some danger. All he could see that this young woman had auburn hair... like Lily. But it couldn't be her, he reminded himself, Lily has longer hair than this woman. He knew that, after all, he had spent many many hours just staring at her hair. Her beautiful wavy hair. Aaaach,_ Lily_.

But then they stopped kissing, gasping for air. The look on James' face was priceless. It was really Lily Evans, seventeen year old witch, his classmate.

He felt anger and jealousy building up in his chest. How dare she ..._snog_ any other boy not being him ! How could she... after he had confessed his love for her ! And with such a guy ! He didn't deserve her... she could do better.

James stood up quickly, and almost ran to the happy couple.

"You... wanker," and before anybody could say 'Lily', James punched him hard in his face.

"Potter ! No, Derek !" Lily shouted and tried to save her boyfriend.

James looked at Lily how she was embracing the WANKER, with shaking his fist in pain.

"What the hell you want ?" Derek asked angrily, too.

"Stay away from her, and leave her alone !"

"Why-" Derek started but was cut off by the girl in question.

"Who am I, your possession ? I've told you thousand times YOU stay away from me "

"Well, you could do better, Evans. You could choose some better bloke, not that one who hides behind a girl," James knew he shouldn't have told that, but sometimes it is hard not to follow you anger.

"Don't you dare-" again Derek started but was once again cut by Lily.

"Stop that, honey. He's not worth it. He's just jealous of you," she said and put her finger on his mouth.

James, his anger aggravated even more, couldn't control himself: "Who are you, anyway ? Some stupid Hufflepuff coward..."

"Stop it," Lily tried to interrupt him.

"...who doesn't even know to cast 'expelliarmus..."

"Stop it now ! " Lily's voice sounded now more desperately.

"... and who can't understand what EVERYBODY in Hogwarts"

"Shut up "

"...understands that my wand is quickier and more powerful than his, " and with these words he took out his wand, and casted a spell. However Lily was quickier and created the Shield Charm.

"You FOOL !!! You could harm him!"

"He's a coward," James muttered but he didn't take notice of the look of horror on Derek's face.

"No, he's not ! He's a MUGGLE, for God's sake !"

Shit. No, he couldn't be. However he saw Derek's face and immediately believed her. Crap. This shouldn't have happened.

"You git, you..." she couldn't even find words. Hell, in was in BIG trouble.

She obliviated Derek, and sent him home. Then she turned to James.

"What did THAT mean ?" she started dangerously calmly. Bad.

"I..." In fact, James didn't have anything to apologise. This wasn't nothing. He could reveal the Wizarding world to muggles. He could HURT innocent muggle.

"You could kill him, you prat. KILL. I thought you despise you-know-who and what ? You're doing the same !" Lily shouted.

"I wouldn't _kill_ him. It was only a ..." but Lily ignored him.

"And apart from that, I thought I were a free person. Not your property ! You had absolutely NO right ! "

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

He was disgusted with himself. What had he done ? She was right- he was practically doing the same as Voldemort in one way. Hexing random people in corridors, his arrogance. But in deep James knew he wasn't so bad. He could change. He would change. For himself. For Lily.

_A/N: Okay, this is my first oneshot, so please REVIEW ! I plead you ! I might even write a sequel if I got enough reviews. _:D

_LilyMargaret _


	2. Chapter 2

James stopped before the door of the Head compartment of the Hogwarts express. He checked the time. 10:55 a.m. He was there on time. Now he was about to meet Lily Evans, his co-Head. For the first time after that meeting in the summer. What should he say ? After that incident ? He had absolutely no idea. He was breathing deeply in an attempt to control himself. In vain. He realised his hands were shaking. This won't be good. He cautiously opened the door, and stepped inside.

Lily was sitting beside the window, looking at the cloudy sky. She had been already changed to Hogwarts' robes. Her auburn wavy hair were gorgeous as ever. It seemed that she refused to look at him. James felt nervous. he had to say something. But what ?

He coughed. She still ignored him.

"Erm, well, erm- I'm Headboy, you know," he stuttered. And mentally slapped himself. He couldn't believe he actually said that.  
'What a great statement !' he thought ironically, 'I even forgot to greet her !'

She still avoided his eyes, and stubbornly looked elsewhere than him. He didn't know what to do, so he sat down, and stared at the ground. He hated awkward silences.

She at last started to talk: "I know, Mary told me," was all she said.

He was startled by her soft quiet voice. Of course. Mary's mother was a great friend of his mother. How come he hadn't thought of it before ?

She stood up, and told him: "I think we should start Prefects' meeting."

"Wait," he said, "I want to tell you something." We must admit he possessed a great deal of courage. He had wanted to tell her that since he came home from the park.

"What ?" she pretended she didn't know. She still refused to look at him in the eyes, so she was gazing at his shoulder instead.

"I-I, erm -I. Shit," he cursed. Really great move, James. Now he was more nervous than in front of a coupe. His hand immediately reached his hair to ruffle them. It would have been better if she had been looking at him, not at the floor. God, he was more coherent when she was yelling, screaming, frowning, simply angry. That was Lily he knew. Not this shy silent girl with emerald eyes. 'Get a grip !' James thought.

"I'm sorry," he said quickly. So quickly that Lily almost didn't understand him. He unconsciously sighed. He had meant it to say in a more... eloquent way. Unfortunately, nothing is like planned.

She looked at him coldly, and she slowly said: "You think it's that easy ? You apologise, I forgive, we forget ? And I'll be so swept off my feet that I fall into your open arms ? " she was frowning and slightly shaking her head in a disgusted manner.

James took a little step back. This new Lily was kind of scary. No yelling ? No screaming ? He could cope with that. With her cold demeanor ? Nope. He had always thought Lily was a temperament girl; that she couldn't act calmly.

"No, no ! Of course not ! I just thought- " he cried.

"So why are you telling me all this crap ?" she sighed. "We should move on. Prefects are waiting."

"But I can't withstand this ! I can't withstand you ignoring me, I can't withstand you being speechless in my presence !" James shouted without thinking what he was saying, without any eloquence or advisability. The only thing he knew was he had to say it.

"Maybe you're content with this kind of relationship, you might be- I, I just I am not. I made a terrible mistake, yes, a huge mistake, but, shit, I am truly sorry about that. I acted like an idiot, you had every right to do what you did, but for God's sake," he slowed down and took a breath, "at least talk with me. You may yell at me as well, but I'd prefer talking." He couldn't help himself but to joke a little.

She was looking at him unbelievably. Her eyes were wide, and were trying to see if he was telling the truth.

James backed off because of her glare. He wasn't now so sure if he had done the right thing. She might go away, she might slap him (when he is nervous he tends to exaggerate, so we must forgive him), she might never speak to him.

After some time (hours to James, seconds to the world) she asked him in a low voice: "Does it mean so much to you ?" James let out a breath he didn't know he was holding. Wait. Why is she asking this ? He thought he had showed her that it did mean. Wasn't he chasing her for, what, about 3 years ? Or more ? Women are strange. Sometimes.

"O-Of course. Well- yeah, " Why she had such effect on him was beyond him. Why was he always stuttering ? Today he stuttered - well, _too_ many times.

She took a deep breath.

"So, what should we do, then ? " she questioned -as James noticed- slightly blushing.

_Wow. _As much as it seems like a cliche, his heart started beating faster and therefore louder. He was sure Lily could hear it. However he couldn't influence it. His dream (or at least a part of) was coming true. Lily Evans was asking him, him what should they do. His head was in turmoil, he couldn't see nor hear anything else but Lily. At last, he regained his composure.

"I think, we should be friends. Don't you think ? " he asked without any stuttering (finally !) he even dared to smile.

Lily smiled. She couldn't help it, it was so sweet (at least for her). James' heart skipped a beat. (I made her smile ! I made her smile ! I made her smile !)

"Just friends ?" she checked. Her eyebrow was lifted high.

"Just friends, " he nodded with a mental note: 'for now'

She glanced at him suspiciously but afterwards she gave up and smiled : "Alright,"

No words could describe James' happiness. An early Christmas. Unexpected pleasant surprise. Because this is a step. A big step, if we remember that she refused to spend only one unnecessary minute in his presence.

James couldn't believe he was so lucky. Is she real ? Isn't it a joke ? No, it can't be. His smile was as wide as... you get the point.  
Then he remembered. She must know. She had to know...

"And... you know, I don't expect you to forgive me. I just-"

"I know, James,"

"I just wanted you to know-"

"Let's be silent on this subject for now," she stated graciously, "I don't want to talk about it."

"I got angry, and that sort of- went out of me, I didn't intend to do it, I swear." he said hastily.

"Again not listening, are you ?" said mildly annoyed Lily, "No, James, I understand you. Just, please," she emphasised this, "don't do it again."

"But you must agree it was quite hard not to-"

She rolled her eyes. "James, Derek was just a-" she sighed, "We've broken up."

"What ? " James couldn't believe it. And he felt quite stupid. Damn his stubbornness !

"Yeah, well, we weren't so- alike, and such," Lily was blushing. He loved like she blushed. In fact he loved almost everything about her. Unfortunately, he hadn't admitted it even for himself, because really, 17-year old not-so-much-cocky-but-still-cocky James Potter, quiddich captain, marauder, Head boy would admit he loved unconditionally, truly, deeply some girl ? Even when it wasn't only 'some girl'.

"It wasn't so serious," she said. James wondered why on earth she was telling him this.

She nervously laughed a little, like she was reading his mind.

"I'm telling you because- you're my friend ?" she started as a statement, and ended like a question. James had to smile, that was such a Lily-ish thing.

"Damn right you are !", he uttered happily.

"Right. Now, my friend, let's go to the prefects, they've been waiting for us- like 10 minutes ? " she smiled at him.

* * *

"So, how'd it go ?" Sirius asked with full mouth.

James had just returned from the meeting to the "Marauders' coupe" as they named it. It didn't matter it was always different each time.

"Hey, have you left anything for me ?" James asked them as all marauders except him were choking with food.

"Sorry, we have a dinner tonight," said Moony with a devilish grin.

"Great, " James fumed.

"Oh, come on, what's happened with Lily ? We haven't heard her shouting, but we figured that her voice doesn't have to be so strong, " Sirius laughed.

"It went fine, " James carefully said.

"That's all ? Oh, come on !"

James rolled his eyes. "We're friends now. "

"As friends with benefits ?" Sirius innocently asked.

"Merlin, Padfoot, NO ! That's all. For now, of course, " James had to add.

"Well, good luck, " Remus stopped any other conversation that could occur.

Author's note: Ok, I know, I'm little... late, but I'm really sorry. I've got a little difficult time now, aren't you guys too much angry ?

And: PLEASE REVIEW !!! It makes my day )


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